Its getting harder

New Problem

2007-09-20T18:50:04+02:00

Ok i like this guy but i dont think he likes me.
We talk on msn and he was reli easy to tlk to about my bulimia.
He has a totally diffo crowd of friends then me we call them the plastics cause there perfect.
They found out at sch and so i thought i shud kinda tell him but not revealing too much when i told him on msn he was kl bout it and said he didnt mind.
The girls at sch are still teasing me do u thnk i shud act upon my feelings or not ? leave comments xxx

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title-2983400

2007-09-15T11:25:03+02:00

Hi everyone i think im getting better even though i hate to admit it.
i checked myself in to a doctors program on monday and so fcar its going well and i admit i have a problem that needs to be taken care of.

I wont to be slim and slender not anorexic my eating habbits are gettting better i have people keeping a close eye on me whilst i eat to make sure i am not sneeking it away.

and the bulumic sympotons are getting better, i am being sick a lot less mayb twice a day were as b4 it was about 5 times a day and sometimes after i eat a single thing.

thanks everyone for suppourting me this being on so long im glad i finally have got the courage to tell people about it.

thankyou vry much

xxxx

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Annoyed

2007-09-12T13:53:06+02:00

I was thinking about something i saw on tv a few weeks ago this morning and i found myself annoyed.

I watch a teen soap/drama on c4 called hollyoaks.
It recentlly contained a storyline of too bulimic girls called hannah and melissa.

Mellisa was a model and hannah was her friend but wasnt a model.
She went with melisa to one of her shoots one tym and the photographer told her she could be a model if she lost weight.

This made hannah have a complex and she started making herself sick

This annoyed me because why use a skiny girl who has nothing wrong with her to play the part of a bulimic suferer.!!!!!!!!!!

I dont understand if you do then leave me a comment.

bye xxx

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The Eating

2007-09-11T20:45:21+02:00

Each day is getting harder. No one knows thats why i turn to my blog its a easier realease for me.
I ate a whole meal tonight and on the last forkfull i felt the guilt overtake my brain.

Incase you hadnt yet realised im balimic.
I have been for about a few years now.

I eat 3 set meals and throw 85% of them back up and i excersise for an hour every single day.

When i am sick it feels as though the guilt is lifted from my body that is until the next time i eat.

I guess it started when i started high school in year 7.
I got bullied badlly by a certain group of girls in year 7 and it made me loose all my self-asteem.

I feel guilty right now and will probably throw up in a min.
So im going to draw this blog to a close i will write some more tommorow.

I just want evryone to know im not doing it for sympathy life people think bulimia suffers do it for im doing it because im fat.

Bye xx

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